Why More?

Why are twenty-somethings always wanting more? And, I guess this doesn’t just apply to twenty-somethings, but why do people in general continuously strive for more? More things, more money, more friends, more popularity, more time, more goals, more food, more clothes, more anything and everything! I’ve thought about this for some time and I think life becomes boring and somewhat depressing without wanting more of something out of your life. Take my situation for example.

Since my last post, I moved back home, got a new job and I am now saving money to get my own place with my boyfriend and I’m working on getting a new “dream job”. Once I get those things, then what? So I have my house I’ve always wanted and my new career. What do I want next? I’ll want to get married and start a family. Then, from there, the list will go on for the needs and wants of my children. Bottom line, I’m always going to want things, and those things that I want more of are going to change through each stage of my life.

When people think of an individual who wants more, they often perceive one as greedy, selfish, or unthankful. But, I don’t really see it like that at all. If you desire something, that means you have a spark in you, a drive that keeps you motivated or goals to keep your time here on Earth enjoyable and worthwhile. I think if you are at a point in your life where you don’t want anything, life can seem depressing. I guess thats why some people potentially turn to drugs/alcohol. Maybe drugs/alcohol numb feelings of emptiness or the perception that nothing really matters.

I hate when people criticize other people’s wants/goals/needs. How many times have you heard someone say, “That’s not reality”. Actually, it is reality. Everyone creates their own construct of reality. Having high hopes, dreams, goals, all exist in someone’s head. Even if its far reaching, how can you tell someone that its not reality? It is their reality. Anyone has the potential to do, be or want anything in this world. The reality lays in whether you reach that potential.

I’ll think I’m always going to want more out of life because, the very construct of wanting/needing more makes me happy. I think it makes other people happy too.

How many of you want more right now?

 

 

 

 

 

Current Blues

What’s on my mind today? I’m here to spill the beans. I have been contemplating writing about my life specifically and keeping my posts more about general feelings and thoughts that most other twenty-something’s could relate to, but who am I kidding?

I’m not even remotely close to your typical 25 year old. Maybe I’ve always wanted to have the mindset or the ability to let go and feel like a twenty-something. But, I’ve always been too mature for my own good. Heck, I am dating a guy 17 years older than me with two older kids and a crazy baby mama that hates my guts. It has always been a struggle for me to truly “act my age”. What does “acting your age” really even mean, anyway? Everyone is so different and I know there are others like me out there but the fact that society perceives individuals in their 20’s to be free spirited, fun, energetic, hard-working and determined AND the fact that I don’t feel that way a majority of the time, gives me a headache. I just want to be a twenty-something that acts and feels like a twenty-something with life problems that aren’t really serious life problems. As I write this, I feel bad in a way because I don’t really have any serious life problems. Maybe I do feel like a twenty-something.

I just want to be like the pretty girls on Instagram, Pinterest, and Tumblr with fit bods, perfect eyebrows, cute clothes, and I want to drink mimosas and eat yummy brunches and fancy dinners, go on trips, get married, get a golden retriever puppy, have a cute baby, and a house with a wrap-around porch with rustic décor. I want to be handy and do DIY shit and hang out with friends and make awesome memories. That’s not too much to ask, right? My life just seems so dull right now.

Here’s the breakdown in summary. Great job for 6 years. Laid-off. Went to graduate school during the “Great job”. Got Master’s degree at 23. Big Loan. Finally got my dream job I was working towards for over a year. Moved to Miami. Great Money. Great Benefits. Realized my dream job wasn’t my dream job. Resigned. Waiting to move back to Orlando. No Benefits. No Money. No Job lined up. Don’t know what to do with my life. Lots of Bills. Stuck.

Thankfully, I have that older, more mature boyfriend with his head on his shoulders, that can support me for now during my transition. And parents that are also supportive of my decisions with pretty much everything.

It’s crazy because I see all of my friends on social media just now starting to really get into their careers and I was always way ahead of the game and now I’m falling behind and practically starting over. It’s hard not to compare myself to what I see on social media and just talking with my friends and even family. But, I know I can’t do that. Its not healthy and I have to tell myself that I’ve done a lot thus far and I’m going to work towards picking up the pieces and being my own version of success again.

Rant over.

In Pursuit of Happiness

When people get into their twenties, we really start to think about happiness. Why? Because we are thrown into this complex world of responsibility, pressures, and competition. Everything starts to get very real. At first, its exciting. You finally “feel” like a grown-up. Its what you have been waiting for your whole life up to this point. Our parents always warned us that it wouldn’t be easy and to enjoy being a kid while we can, but in the back of our minds, all we wanted to do was grow up. Now, I know why our parents said what they did. We start to think about happiness because the complexities overwhelm us and we start to reevaluate every aspect of our lives. I am pretty sure I am talking about what others may call, the “quarter-life crisis”.

We always had this preconceived notion that “Adulting” was supposed to be wonderful, inspiring, fun and without limitations. But instead, we may feel the opposite; stuck, uninspired, drained, and full of choices to make. Don’t get me wrong, “Adulting” has the potential to be all of those great things that we thought it once was, and at times, it is, but its always when we feel like we have things “All figured out”. I am here to tell you that its okay to not have your life figured out. It may not be overnight, but you will figure it out eventually. Things will fall into place. You literally have to take life one step and one day at a time. And most of all, stop comparing yourself to others because it can destroy you.

Write down the things that make you happy and the things that don’t. Start eliminating things that hinder your pursuit of happiness by making short-term and long-term goals. Strive for a balance between comfort and risk, routine and spontaneity, giving and receiving, work and relaxation. What happiness really comes down to is balancing your life.

Ultimately, we are on this constant quest to find our purpose and destiny. If there’s anything I’ve learned throughout my twenties thus far, its that your purpose may change throughout your course, so don’t get discouraged, and your destiny starts to become fulfilled when you live in happiness. Get back your “Carpe diem” attitude and start living your balanced life.

“I’m in love with the CoCo”- O.T. Genasis

So even though we all know that song isn’t really about coffee, it should be! Someone please answer this! Why does coffee all of the sudden become a G-dsend when you are in your twenties? Coffee equals LIFE pretty much at this point in our lives. It keeps us going, it tastes good, it smells good, its trendy, it’s a social gathering, it’s a sanction, its relaxation, its time, money, it’s the ULTIMATE transition into adulthood. And I love how when one first gets into coffee, its all about the cream and sugar goodness or how I like to call it, the “desserts”- the cooladas, cappuccinos, frappucinos, macchiatos, real venti trenti white-girl shit. Then it turns into different flavors of coffee or creamers with sugar, then just cream and a little sugar, then just cream or sugar, then oh no black with just a smidge of sugar, and then just black altogether. It’s so extreme; coffee lovers go from Beverly Hills to the Hood real quick. Don’t get me wrong, when the holidays come around, I definitely take part in the pumpkin-spiced lattes and the peppermint mocha frapps, but coffee in its purest form is where its at! Once you go black, you never go back! And for the health nuts out there, a cup of black coffee a day can help boost your metabolism. Winning 😉

But….

How come it never appealed to us when we were younger? Why is it the ultimate transition into adulthood? I was always busy in high school. Coffee was always all around me but I never really got into it until I finished college and realized my life was just work. Its weird because I had more responsibilities during high school and college such as having to juggle work and school full-time, doing homework, studying for tests, dancing, hanging out with my family and friends, but now all I pretty much do, well did, that’s another story, is work. An 8-hour a day commitment and it drains me to my core and without coffee, it would just seem unbearable. What changed over the course of the past couple years? Why can’t I be as naturally energetic as I once was? Why do I have to use this coffee crutch to make my days run smoothly? If you think about it, coffee is like a form of addiction.

Its this drug that we twenty-something’s experiment with. We start off doing the light, easy shit. Then, we delve into the hardcore stuff and from there on out, we are dependent on it for life. I know this sounds like coffee is a bad thing. But, its not. Of course, too much of anything is not good for you, but I can honestly say that coffee makes my day. I look forward to waking up and drinking it first thing in the morning and it actually sets a positive tone for my day. What does coffee do for you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“1738- I’m like “Hey, what’s up? Hello” -Fetty

So I’ve decided to write a blog. Write what you know, right? From what I’ve read through Pinterest boards and browsing the web (But mostly Pinterest haha), blogs have to have a special purpose, meaning or theme if you will. Otherwise, it is not likely to be successful. I say, fuck that. I think anything can be successful if its something that is real and will interest people. Why write only what we know? I want to write about things I don’t know and things I want to know-what’s real in my mind and share my experiences so that others can relate and talk about different subjects of life. Okay, so maybe this isn’t a blog. Maybe a journal? Whatever this is going to be, I know I had to start somewhere. I always think about things, and when I say things, I am talking about people, places, stories, objects, philosophies, events, health, pretty much everything we start to think more deeply about when we get into our twenties! So lets share thoughts.

“I totally wish I was Lizzie McGuire and I had best friends like Gordo and Miranda”

Everyone wants to share what they are thinking with someone; whether that be a family member, spouse/bf/gf, friend, coworker, hey, maybe even a stranger. It’s not natural for humans to be mute, to not express themselves in one way or another. Relationships of all kinds are so important to humanity and our psyche. Lets be honest here, I totally wish I was Lizzie McGuire and I had best friends like Gordo and Miranda. I even wish I had the little cartoon of her acting out my experiences through life. That show was the bomb!

Anyway, personally, I am thankful to have such great relationships in my life. I have awesome parents, two crazy, funny, wonderful sisters, a loving, caring boyfriend, and many great friends. If I have such great relationships in my life, why do I feel so alone with my thoughts sometimes? I have plenty of people to talk to, so that’s not a problem. I’m still trying to figure this one out. Maybe I’m embarrassed of my thoughts sometimes or what the people I care about will think of me. I know that may sound silly, but I’m thinking of all possibilities here. Maybe I need to be okay with having my own thoughts and not always feeling like I need to share. Side Bar: ***I am a strong believer in loving yourself and being independent. You never know what life is going to hand you, and if you have peace with yourself, you will always truly be happy.

I do want to share my thoughts with people but maybe I think I consciously know that sometimes things I want to talk about won’t interest the people who I care about in my life. Either way, its easier to start by writing it down. When I’m talking about “sharing my thoughts,” I’m talking about things that randomly just pop up in my mind that I like to dissect in deep thought like space, the universe, aliens, ghosts, words, behaviors, actions, emotions, animals, places, love, relationships, food, careers, art, paper, social media, TV, fashion, holidays, zombies, anything and everything! Who’s with me?

Body Hair is a Nightmare

In one hour I have an appointment for laser hair removal. Why the fuck am I doing this? This is my 4th treatment and it hurts like hell. Well, I started it because I wanted to do something for myself and I figured, why not? I moved to Miami and I thought since its so damn hot here, I’d be wearing more shorts and tanks and I didn’t want to have to worry about shaving all the time. Also, I am light skinned and even after I shave, you can still see the hair under my arms or my legs. Why do I have to be an Italian mut? Can’t I just have perfect underarms and legs, that’s not too much to ask, right? After each treatment, I literally contemplate why I torture myself. But like anything, I know in the back of my mind that it will be “worth it in the end”. Of course I question myself every time I lay down in that office.

  • Is this really going to work? Sounds too good to be true.
  • How could it possibly remove my hair for life?
  • Why can’t I just be happy looking like a monkey?> they’re cute!
  • This is going to relieve time spent shaving in the long run
  • No more razors!
  • I can do this.
  • I hate hair. It feels disgusting. It’s unwanted.

My reasoning is just that.

What are your thoughts?